When Your Toddler Says “No” to Everything: How You Can Respond with Patience and Confidence

September 18, 2025

If you have a toddler, you’ve probably heard the word “no” more times in a day than you can count. Whether it’s refusing food, clothes, bedtime, or simply resisting just because they can—toddlers often seem to thrive on saying no. While it can feel exhausting (and even oppositional), this phase is actually a healthy and important step in your child’s development.

Why Toddlers Say No

Toddlers are beginning to discover that they are their own person, separate from mom and dad. Saying no is one of the first tools they use to express independence and test boundaries. At this age, they don’t yet have the emotional regulation or vocabulary to express their big feelings, so opposition becomes their default language.

Think of it this way: your child is not trying to make your life harder—they’re trying to figure out how to navigate a big world where they finally realize they have some control.

What’s Normal and What’s Not

Normal toddler behavior: Frequent refusals, tantrums, or insisting on doing things their way.
When to pay closer attention: If the “no’s” are extreme, constant across settings, or paired with aggression, consult your pediatrician for guidance. But for most toddlers, this is a healthy stage that will pass.

Strategies for Parents

1. Realize This is Likely Normal Behavior

Realize that when your toddler is saying no and you are feeling overwhelmed, you are experiencing a perfectly normal part of parenting. It is okay to feel frustrated—this stage is temporary and does not mean you are doing anything wrong.

2. Offer Choices, Not Open-Ended Questions

Instead of asking, “Do you want to put on your shoes?” (which invites a no), try:
“Do you want to wear the red shoes or the blue ones?”
Choices give your toddler a sense of control while still moving things forward.

3. Pick Your Battles

Not every “no” needs to be a fight. Save your energy for safety and essential issues. If your toddler insists on wearing mismatched socks to the park, it’s okay to let it go.

4. Use Clear and Calm Language

Keep instructions short and simple. Instead of long explanations, say:
“It’s time for bed. Let’s read a story.”
Consistency and calmness help reduce the power struggles.

5. Redirect and Distract

Sometimes the quickest way to move past a “no” is to shift focus. Toddlers are easily drawn to something new:
“You don’t want to brush your teeth? Let’s see if Mr. Dinosaur wants to brush his teeth first!”

6. Validate Their Feelings

Acknowledge their frustration before moving forward:
“I hear you. You don’t want to stop playing. That’s hard. It’s time for lunch now.”
When toddlers feel understood, they’re more likely to cooperate.

7. Model Calm Behavior

Your response teaches your child how to handle conflict. If you meet defiance with shouting, they learn to escalate. If you meet it with steady patience, you show them how to regulate big emotions.

When “No” Turns Into Screaming and Kicking

Sometimes toddlers don’t just say no—they scream, kick, or throw themselves on the floor. These meltdowns can feel overwhelming, but they’re usually a sign that your child is overloaded with emotions they don’t yet know how to manage.

How to Respond in the Moment

Stay calm and safe: Make sure your child and those around them are safe. If needed, gently guide them to a safe space.
Keep your own emotions in check: Deep breaths, a calm voice, and steady body language help defuse the storm.
Don’t match their intensity: Meeting a tantrum with yelling or threats often makes it worse.

What to Say

Simple, soothing words are best:

“You’re really mad right now. I’m here.”
“I won’t let you kick me. Let’s calm our body.”
“When you’re ready, we can try again.”

After the Storm

Once your toddler has calmed down, reconnect with reassurance:
“You were upset when it was time to leave the park. Next time, we’ll take a deep breath together.”
Keep it short, gentle, and focused on teaching—not shaming.

Encouragement for Parents

This “no” phase is tiring, but it’s temporary. What feels like defiance is really your toddler practicing independence, decision-making, and self-expression. By guiding them with love, structure, and patience, you’re helping them develop the very skills they’ll need to thrive later on.

Remember: your calm presence matters more than getting it “right” every time. You’re not alone—every parent of a toddler walks through this stage, and you will come out the other side with a child who has learned how to say yes.

How We Support Toddlers at Berwyn Early Learning Academy

At Berwyn Early Learning Academy, we understand that toddler “no’s” and meltdowns are part of growing up. Our teachers use calm, consistent strategies to help children build confidence and self-control.

Predictable routines that reduce power struggles
Safe choices that encourage independence
Gentle emotional coaching to handle big feelings
Strong communication with families so home and school work together

We’re here to partner with you in guiding your child through this important stage.

👉 Ready to see how we can support your family? Book a tour today!

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Faith Without An Unfollow Button

Published: January 29, 2026

Today, following someone is easy. You follow a YouTuber because their videos are interesting. You follow someone on Instagram or Facebook because you want to see what they post. And if their content changes—or stops feeling useful—you can unfollow without much thought. Following, in our culture, usually means: I’ll pay attention to you—as long as it works for me. But when Jesus invites people to follow him, he means something fundamentally different from following someone online. As described in the Gospel of Matthew 4:19, when Jesus called his first disciples, Simon Peter and Andrew, with the simple yet profound invitation, 'Follow me,' it was a call to a transformative journey. This invitation implied dedicating one's life to a new path, reshaping beliefs, priorities, and actions in alignment with his teachings. Following on Our Terms When we follow someone online, we stay in control. We decide: when to engage, how closely to listen, and when to walk away. Even when we deeply admire someone, following them still happens on our terms. We take what we like, scroll past what we don’t, and move on when it becomes uncomfortable. That’s not a criticism—it’s just how modern life works. But Jesus never framed following him that way. Jesus Doesn’t Ask for Attention — He Asks for Direction When Jesus said, “Follow me,” he wasn’t asking people to watch from a distance. He was inviting them into a new way of living that would reshape how they saw the world, treated others, and understood themselves. Try integrating this into your daily life by starting with one small act of compassion, such as helping a neighbor or showing kindness to a stranger. This simple practice can begin to transform perspectives and actions in alignment with his teachings. Following Jesus meant: rethinking who matters, redefining what power looks like, and choosing love even when it comes at a cost. It wasn’t about agreeing with every idea in advance. It was about stepping into a life shaped by compassion, courage, and a sense of responsibility for one another. When Following Becomes Costly This distinct approach affects real-life decisions, especially when following Jesus leads into uncomfortable or risky places. A recent example comes from pastors and faith leaders across the United States who spoke out against a proposed federal policy that would allow immigration enforcement actions in churches and other sacred spaces. These leaders publicly opposed the policy, not because it was popular or safe, but because they believed it violated something essential about human dignity and sacred hospitality. According to reporting by United Methodist News , These pastors stood together across communities and traditions to say that faith is not just private belief—it shapes how we protect the vulnerable and how we respond when fear is used as a tool of power. For them, following Jesus meant showing up, speaking out, and accepting backlash—because silence would contradict the love they preach. That kind of following doesn’t come with an “unfollow” button. How Can a Church Support One Another When Following Jesus Feels Risky? At Berwyn United Methodist Church, we believe that following Jesus was never meant to be a solo journey. We warmly invite you to join us at our Sunday service, held at 10 AM each week, where you can connect with others who are on the same journey. And consider participating in our community events, such as our monthly potluck dinner, where everyone is welcome to enjoy food and fellowship. Jesus gathered people into community not for uniformity of thought, but so they could support each other when the path became difficult. When faith leads us into challenges or risky acts of public love, the church offers grounding, encouragement, and shared courage. We support one another by: Making room for honest conversation. Questions, doubts, and disagreements are not signs of weak faith—they are part of growth. We strive to be a community where people can speak honestly and be met with curiosity rather than judgment. Showing up for one another. When someone feels called to act in love or speak out for justice, they shouldn’t have to do it alone. We stand with one another—through encouragement, presence, and prayer. Listening together before acting. We take time to reflect, pray, and discern as a community, trusting that faithful action is shaped by listening to God and to one another. Extending grace as we grow. Not everyone is in the same place, and that’s okay. Supporting one another means honoring different journeys while remaining rooted in love. In times of discomfort, we look to our community—grounded in grace, guided by compassion, and committed to loving our neighbors in real and tangible ways. Following Isn’t Perfection — It’s Direction One of the hardest misunderstandings about following Jesus is the idea that it requires certainty or moral perfection. It doesn’t demand flawlessness but rather honesty in acknowledging our shortcomings and persistence in our spiritual journey. Following Jesus is not about having everything figured out. It’s about allowing love to keep pulling you forward—toward greater honesty, deeper mercy, and wider care for others. People who follow Jesus will disagree, stumble, and change over time. That’s not failure. That’s growth. What matters is the direction of the heart: toward justice rather than indifference, toward grace rather than fear, toward community rather than isolation. A Different Kind of Following So when we talk about following Jesus, we’re not talking about passively consuming religious content, agreeing with every doctrine, or selectively curating a spiritual identity the way one might online. We are talking about something else entirely—a way of life. We’re talking about a way of life. A life where love has consequences. Where faith shows up in public, not just in private. Where following means being willing to be changed. Following Jesus is more demanding than simply paying attention online. Its deeper meaning—true transformation—sets the direction for every part of life: public, private, and relational. If these ideas raise questions, spark curiosity, or even create some discomfort, you’re not alone. Faith grows through conversation, reflection, and shared listening. The church is not a gathering of people who have everything figured out. It is a place where people are allowed to try, to grow, to fail, and to be helped back up so they can try again. Whether you are exploring, questioning, or simply wondering what following Jesus might look like in your own life, know that you don’t have to walk the path alone. You are always welcome to engage, ask, and reflect alongside others at your own pace. Additionally, we invite you to reach out personally by contacting a pastor or joining one of our conversation groups. These personal connections can provide reassurance and community for those who feel hesitant or alone. Together, we can discover the courage, love, and hope that come from truly following and supporting one another as we live out this journey in a changing world.

What To Look For In A Quality Childcare Program?

Published: December 11, 2025

Finding the right childcare program is one of the most important decisions a family can make. Whether you’re preparing for your child’s very first day of care or considering a change, the search can feel overwhelming. What questions should you ask? What should you really be looking for? The good news: high-quality childcare programs share several key characteristics that you can spot with a discerning eye. Here’s a clear, parent-friendly guide to help you evaluate any program with confidence. 1. Warm, Responsive Relationships The heart of early childhood education is the relationship between teachers and children. During your visit, look for: Teachers who kneel to meet children at eye level Gentle tones, smiles, and encouragement Adults who genuinely seem to enjoy children Research shows that strong relationships build the foundation for learning, emotional development, and security. If the staff seems rushed or disengaged—or if high turnover is mentioned often—that’s a red flag. 2. A Safe, Clean, and Purposeful Environment A high-quality program balances safety with a sense of exploration. Look for: Cleanliness and well-maintained classrooms Secure entrances and clear safety procedures Organized spaces with defined learning areas (dramatic play, blocks, art, sensory, quiet spaces) Child-sized furniture and materials If you feel at ease walking through the building, that’s a strong indicator your child will feel at ease too. 3. Play-Based, Developmentally Appropriate Learning Young children learn best through purposeful play. Quality programs offer: Hands-on activities Opportunities for creativity and inquiry Outdoor exploration Teachers who guide learning instead of directing it Avoid programs that rely heavily on worksheets or long periods of sitting—those approaches aren’t aligned with early childhood best practices. 4. Experienced, Well-Trained Educators The educators make the difference. Ask about: Teacher qualifications Ongoing professional development Years of experience in early childhood settings High-quality programs invest in their educators because strong teaching leads to strong outcomes. 5. Clear Communication and Family Partnership You should never feel in the dark about your child’s day. Quality programs provide: Daily communication (app, email, or written notes) Opportunities for parent-teacher conversations A genuine openness to questions and concerns Family engagement events and community-building If communication feels warm, transparent, and consistent, you’ve likely found a program that values partnership. 6. A Philosophy You Believe In Every program has a worldview that shapes how children are cared for and taught. Ask about: Their vision for child development How they support social-emotional learning Approaches to discipline, conflict resolution, and inclusion How they nurture curiosity and independence The best fit is a program whose philosophy matches your hopes for your child. 7. Trusting Your Instincts You know your child better than anyone. As you tour: Do you feel welcomed? Do children seem happy and engaged? Can you picture your child thriving here? Your instincts matter. If something feels off, explore more options. If something feels right, lean into that. Final Thoughts Choosing a childcare center is choosing a partner in your child’s growth. Look for warmth, intentionality, communication, and a place where children are known and celebrated. A quality program doesn’t just watch your child—it nurtures them, inspires them, and helps them flourish. And at BELA, that’s exactly what we strive to do every single day.Your child deserves a nurturing, high-quality learning environment—and BELA is ready to provide it. If you’re exploring childcare options, now is the perfect time to connect with our team, tour our beautiful campus, and learn how our programs can support your child’s growth from infancy through Pre-K. Click below to schedule a visit and take the next step toward joining the BELA community.

When Your Toddler Says “No” to Everything: How You Can Respond with Patience and Confidence